April 1st... my sweet mother passed aways 8 years ago today, but since she died after midnight, the last day of her life was March 31st, which was Easter that year...
Open letter to my mother:
Dear Mom,
I can't believe it's been 8 years to the day that you left us. It was such a terrible time.... I'm sorry I wasn't there for you like I should've been... I'm sorry I wasn't there for Dad like I should've been... maybe things would've been different if I could've stepped out of my own grief, and helped him. You were always there for Dad; we'd be hard-pressed to find as devoted wife (and mother) as you. The family has never been the same since. You were the matriarch although you probably didn't see that. We were all so dependent on you, and a piece of all of us died when you died... I only wish you could've lived much longer, so that I could show you that I am straightening out my life - finally. It's what you always wanted for me. That hospice woman promised to check on us after you were gone, but she never did. Not once. I think of that sometimes. I'm so terribly sorry that you suffered as you did. Of all the people I've ever known or met, no one was as undeserving of that than you. You always put others before yourself. Always. You were the best mother, all of my friends thought you were the coolest mom of all, and you were. You didn't have one enemy; everyone loved you. You were so full of energy, and life and love. I miss you every day. I am comforted that in your final days, you saw Papaw. And he told you that you didn't have to wear shoes in heaven, since he knew how much you loved to go barefoot. I know you're waiting for us all at the pearly gates with our other loved ones we know, and that makes heaven a lot less scary....
Missing you....
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