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Monday, January 28, 2013

Snarky red carpet review of the 2013 SAG Awards

Well, another Hollywood award show has come and gone...
Sigh.
As soon as I turned on the live from the red carpet on E, I was un-wowed. From the get-go, this award show had no sparkle (literally.) It had no charisma, no excitement, no drama. The stars acted like they could have cared less, and the fashion followed that emotion. Over half of the women wore black. It was like a funeral - only red carpet styled. Here are some of the texts between my grown daughter Alex and me:
Me: This red carpet stinks! All black and blue
Me: Nicole Kidman looks OLD
Alex: She is old
Alex: I think the dresses are plain but I think people look more classy than the Globes
Me: She (Nicole) is sagging! Get it?
Me: I swear it's all black
Me: Tina Fey, blah black
Alex: Always. Snore.
Me: All black or white
Me: Even Ann Hathaway - black
Me: Blah
Alex: They all share the same 5 stylists - you'd think they would coordinate
Me: Good point
Me: Jessica Chastain is in red. She will stand out.
Me: I've seen NO standouts.
Me: Amy Poehler in black...
Alex: So much black. That means color for the Oscars bc they won't all do another black dress.
Me: I agree, this is the least fashionable show, so default black
Me: Freida Pinto is in hot pink
Alex: But this dress is odd
Me: True
Alex: It had a weird cowl neck
Me: Jen Garner looks flooby
Alex: the gold is not flattering
Me: Yeah, she is thin but flabby?
Alex: Yup, having 3 kids will take it's toll
Alex: Amanda Seyfried is best dressed so far
Me: Dark blue - ugh
Me: Claire Danes - black. Goth lipstick - yack.

I tried to watch the award show, but was bored and stayed on my phone until I couldn't take it anymore and did other things around the house. Nothing stood out. No fashions. No speeches. Nothing.
Bleh...


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