Today I read that Michael Douglas is blaming his throat cancer on oral sex. Well, if this is true, the current set of American high schoolers are in big danger...
I'm not sure how oral sex became so, well, non-sex? Maybe we can blame Bill Clinton, since he was president and said that he "did not have sex with that woman," (White House intern, Monica Lewinsky. As a matter of fact, a "Lewinsky" and oral sex are now synonymous. ) Clinton was a master of his own definitions (depends on what the definition of "is" is.) And he did not define oral SEX, as "sex," but only sexual intercourse as "sex." Seems there is an entire generation of kids thinking the same way. As I've mentioned before, oral sex is NOTHING to this generation. The girls think nothing of doing this with guys, and all feel safe that there is no danger of having a baby. Hmmmm, but now this. And, of course, other STD's are transmitted with oral sex as well, it really is not as safe as they think or hope.
Since I have a public school high schooler, I'm learning the social etiquette for their generation. They start out with texting. That shows interest, and if the other is REALLY not interested, they don't even respond. If they are polite and not interested, they answer with one word answers, like "yeah" or "cool" or yes or no. You get the idea. When they are a little more interested, they add "haha" or "LOL" which seem really stupid to me, but since you can't hear emotion in a text, it becomes necessary. Actual talking on the phone doesn't seem to start until they are "dating," but I've gotten ahead of myself.
Even when they date, they still text. A LOT. And can answer whenever they feel like it. When they are SUPER interested in someone, and it's reciprocated, they have a "Thing." And it's not just in our small town, this is all over the US. But having a "thing" means you can't kiss, or be physical. It's just interest showing. (Mainly texting) They don't usually go out together, unless it's in a group of kids, so consequently don't get to know each other that well.
At some point, (and not like the old days, when a guy and girl have gone out on dates and decide they like each other enough to start dating) the guy wants to get physical, so he will ask the girl to "go out." And then they are "going." This means they are exclusive, and the guy expects kissing and much more. (There are some guys who don't expect this, but they are rare, usually religious, and often give in as well.) But most religious guys are pretty faithful, and don't quite follow the norm.
At DD's high school, the boys pay for the girls dates sometimes (and usually in the beginning of the relationship) but then later ask the girl to start helping with paying.
Most kids, even in small towns, do not expect to marry until their mid to late twenties, unless it's the Hispanic culture, and they marry much earlier. They either go to college, or tech school, or start jobs, but they delay adulthood as long as possible. I personally attribute this to the TV show, "Friends," where they go to college, and then hang with friends for their twenties, and just party and be irresponsible until they turn about 30. For most, they then decide to (sort of) be adults, get married, and have a baby. Yet by this age, some of them have addictions and need rehab.
It's a big part of what's wrong in American society.We let our kids delay adulthood, and they become spoiled and useless. They party a lot, go to music venues and bars a lot, and wait to have the responsibility of children. Often they have fertility problems by the time they are ready. And they have become set in their ways.
Anyway.
You see the progression. And early sex trains them into this lifestyle, which is actually physically dangerous. But the cat is out of the bag now. People who want to wait to have sex when they are married are mocked incessantly and made to feel that they are mentally ill (or have homosexual tendencies.) So there you go --
life in 2013...
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