"For God has not given me the spirit of fear, but of power, love and a sound mind."

Today was my annual mammagram... I put it off because just the thought of it was disconcerting. The last one I had was in July of 2010, and I am supposed to have one each year since I was diagnosed (and later healed) of breast cancer in 2006. But in July DD had camp, and then cheerleading and then school started and then work got busy and then and then and then... So I just finished my move and my house repairs are almost done, and I figured I was irresponsible if I didn't go in. Especially when I call yesterday and the radiology place that only screens for breast cancer, asks if I'm "symptomatic." Well, when they ask, I always am. Maybe it's psychological because I've already lost 3 close friends to breast cancer. And my sister has had a breast removed. And my boss is in remission, and my coworker was just diagnosed. It's all around me, and it's the "C" word. So the radiology group said yesterday to come in today - so I did...

I downloaded the Bible app to my iPhone, which I've been meaning to do anyway. But then I grabbed my physical Bible, so I could flip around while there. Plus, it's comforting to me to see all the verses underlined through the years. I kept telling myself that fear is the opposite of faith and that faith pleases God. And that God's words in His word are His promises to His children, those that walk with Him. And His word says, "By the stripes of Jesus, we WERE healed." And I love the one that says, "For the law of life in Christ Jesus, has set me FREE from the law of sin and death" (which includes sickness.) I also like the one, "I will REMOVE sickness from your midst." and "they shall lay hands on the sick and they SHALL recover." As I read Psalms, this one popped out at me, "No evil shall befall you, and no plague will come near your dwelling," (and cancer is certainly a plague to me.) These are the verses I kept claiming as I sat there waiting for an hour since they were super busy at this clinic in San Antonio.

They came for me while all of us sit in this room wearing the same blue tops like we're in prison. (See photo of my view from where I sat.) They take only 4 shots which is less than usual, and say they will come back for me for more if necessary, after a radiologist looks at them. Then they come back... They say they want to do a sonogram, which they've never done before. I say, "Why? Did you see something?" She acts weird and says it's because I said my breasts felt heavy. (I DID move last weekend though.) So, she does a sonogram on my breasts and seems very serious, taking a long time and then tells me to go into the waiting room again. All of the women are nervous and trying to distract themselves on their phones while "The View" plays on the television. I keep reading my Bible, claiming my verses. I make lots of promises to God, this blog post being one of them. And the girl comes back, and timidly says my name, and I wince. She says I'm good to go, and they will see me next year. (Big sigh) Set free from the prison. I say "Praise the Lord!" and tell the others in there, I've been praying for them too.

The world looked brighter all day...